Winds of Change.NET: Monty Python Fruit Skit

July 7, 2002

Monty Python Fruit Skit - For Real

by Joe Katzman at July 7, 2002 4:38 AM

And you thought the Rockland city woman caught driving drunk with 136 live lobsters crawling around in her car was weird...

Monty Python fans will remember the "Self Defense Against Fresh Fruit" skit:

(Cleese): Pointed stick? Oh, oh, oh. We want to learn how to defend ourselves against pointed sticks, do we? Getting all high and mighty, eh? Fresh fruit not good enough for you eh? Well I'll tell you something my lad. When you're walking home tonight and some homicidal maniac comes after you with a bunch of loganberries, don't come crying to me! Now, the passion fruit. When your assailant lunges at you with a passion fruit...

Turns out he may have had a point.

This Friday, 2 former members of the Royal Canadian Mounted Police were convicted of assault with a weapon after attacking Winnipeg city police officers with fruit and vegetables. They were each sentenced to 2 months in jail.

I am not making this up.

From the July 5th Reuters news report:

"The produce assault took place in June, when police arrived at a downtown Winnipeg apartment building to investigate an unrelated break-in.
When the Dauphinee duo, who were visiting a 19th-floor suite in the same building, spotted police on the street below, they began hurling oranges at them. They reloaded with apples and cooking onions.
The Winnipeg police officers testified that they feared for their safety when the oranges and onions started exploding around them. When they arrived at the door of the suite, the recently retired Mounties, said be in a drunken stupor, hopped into bed and pretended to be asleep."

Well, I suppose I'd fear for my safety too if I 'ad organes exploding 'round me. And onions! Why, that's bloody chemical warfare, it is!

Erm, d'ye think we could convince Hamas?

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Comments

#1 from Rob at 7:38 pm on May 26, 2007

In a far far away land called London Kentucky six high school students were kept in jail overnight for starting a food fight before their graduation. There is no word from officials as to whether fresh fruit self-defence will be offered in the fall. Back to you Jon.

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