Winds of Change.NET: Crimson Jihad at Fenway

October 13, 2003

Crimson Jihad at Fenway

by Joe Katzman at October 13, 2003 3:23 AM

Allah In The House has been mysteriously silent this weekend concerning the fate of his beloved Boston Red Sox, who lost Game 2 and then lived up to their Crimson Jihad moniker over the weekend.

At least Pedro managed to successfully defend himself against the 72 year old idiot-savant taking a swing at him, which only goes to show that Allah (ith) is recruiting a more comptent batch of followers these days. We trust the Flight 93 mujahid were taking notes up there.

Even so, the member of Boston's groundskeeping crew admitted to hospital with cleat-marks in his back after a fight with some Yankee pitchers (who trained him, The Saddam Fedayeen?) clearly makes 'The Big A' 1-1... 1-2, actually, since The Crimson Jihad also lost Game 3 to Roger Clemens. This is not a great record for The Divine One, but then I'm sure he's getting used to having his teams given "the 72 virgins treatment" by a Texan.

Parting thought: today's rainout was a nice touch, O Merciful One, but unless it gets John Burkett out of a starting pitcher's role entirely, I fear it only postpones the inevitable. Now, if you could have Burkett start and win Game 4... that would be a miracle.

UPDATE: Never underestimate The Divine Blogger's ability to kick it up another notch. Allah (ith) has a few things to say, complete with photo gallery and captions.

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Comments

#1 from Howard Owens at 3:32 am on Oct 13, 2003

Look, the whole Pedro-Zimmer thing is just the sort of thing to continue the "Myth of Bambino" thing ... see how it works, the Yankees get fired up, refuse to lose, and the Pedro-Zimmer thing gets blamed.

But the rain might be God's way of saying, "OK, I'm going to help the Red Sox out here a bit ... I'm going to give the Yankee's a day to cool off."

#2 from Joe Katzman at 3:46 am on Oct 13, 2003

Actually, the Mercy of Allah In The House is more about giving Boston's tired pitching rotation a rest and giving Lowe an opportunity to pitch in Fenway, rather than cooling down the Yankees.

And if I was the commissioner of baseball, Zimmer would be watching the rest of the playoffs on TV - with strong suggestions that he make the hiatus permanent. For a coach to step onto the field and physically attack the opposition's #1 pitcher, in a playoff game, is beyond ridiculous.

Personally, I though Pedro let him off easy. If Zimmer had tried that stunt with Bob Gibson, for instance, they'd be debating continuation of life support right now.

#3 from Allah at 4:08 am on Oct 13, 2003

After 55 years, Allah knows only too well that his mujahedeen cannot win a direct confrontation with with Jew. If Crimson Jihad manages to send the series back to the Bronx, Allah shall consider it a moral victory.

As for Allah's silence, even now he is working on a glorious photo recap of Game 3. Tune in tomorrow, same Allah time, same Allah channel.

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