One for Mother's Day. This may seem familiar to some, but I didn't make it up. It's from Poets.org...
Mother Doesn't Want a Dog
by Judith ViorstMother doesn't want a dog.
Mother says they smell,
And never sit when you say sit,
Or even when you yell.
And when you come home late at night
And there is ice and snow,
You have to go back out because
The dumb dog has to go.
Mother doesn't want a dog.
Mother says they shed,
And always let the strangers in
And bark at friends instead,
And do disgraceful things on rugs,
And track mud on the floor,
And flop upon your bed at night
And snore their doggy snore.Mother doesn't want a dog.
She's making a mistake.
Because, more than a dog, I think
She will not want this snake.
I have to say, she was less than enthused...
Snakes have no fleas, they eat bugs, they're quiet and they don't drool.
I always liked toads, lizards and snakes more than dogs, but I'm a weird mom.